BEST SCHOOL PIC EVER!!!

Don't judge. I work in Special Education. He is very wiggly. He is also very good looking and has super human strength. Definitely a favorite student.

They promised to crop me.

They lied!!!!!

Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha!!!!!

Yes he is holding a spider!

The Curious Little Yellow Stick

This is the curious tale of the little yellow stick.

One day, after a hard days work. I climbed into a steaming hot bath. I had used a generous amount of Epsom Salts because this particular day I had received a "great many blows". My poor tired body slumped deep within the hot water and the darkness and quietness of the room was breathing me back to Melissa. I suddenly had the feeling I was not alone in the water! (Please play Jaws theme in your head now). Something kept brushing up against my thigh. There it was again and again. I was almost afraid to look but when I did I saw something alarmingly yellow. I reached as if fishing for the king trout and pulled up this little yellow toy.
I somehow smuggled it home from work. I don't know how. I don't know where. It is an enigma. But there it was in the bathwater. Stranger things have never happened in my tub before. From now on I bathe with the light on! 

xoxoxoxox

Double Tap, Mail Art and a Side of Bacon!

Work is always exciting. I love when you can capture a hallmark moment on film. Making a memory last forever. This one is titled "Shaving Cream Double Tap".  ( *Reminder I work in Spec Ed)

 

High Five!!!

 (no harm was sustained to those involved during said shaving cream incident)

I love Swop Bot. I swap art at least 4 times a month. I have really enjoyed mail art. My most recent one you had to fill the entire space with doodles. I found the biggest manila envelope I could find and went to town. It took about a week. The back is just as cool.

Last but not least. I bought my brother in law a awesome game for Christmas. I hope he asks me to play it with him because I LOVE bacon. Check this bad A out!

xoxoxoxoxoxox

Tit Torture Devices and A Tad Bit TMI!

Underwire bras are not my friends. I love them, don't get me wrong. Always there to lift me up when I am down, cheer me up on less perky days and they always have my back, but... when they break they are torture! My favorite underclothing of choice broke at 8:47 a.m. last Tuesday morning while I was at work. The little wires that I have relied on for their support began screaming and stabbing me at any move I would make. There was nothing I could do but suffer the 6.5 hours school lasted. When I got home I took a pair of pilers into my room and romoved ALL the wire from EVERY bra I have!!! No more, never again. My girls are still recovering!!!

xoxoxoxox

Chasing A Thong!

Today while out and about, I lost my thong! Well, one of my flip flops. One might ask themselves how  a person can lose their own footwear? Fair question. Fourth stop of running errands, I just happened to be at the farm store, and I was really getting hungry and tired. I needed to move some things from the back of my jeep into the front seat so I could pick up some big items. You know, like hay, chicken feed etc... While bending and reaching with my little short arms, my legs hung perilously out of the back of the jeep. My flip flop decided to fall off my right foot at the same time a huge, nasty (and obviously bigoted against small feet) wind snapped my flip flop up. Off it went!! By the time I chased it down and got back to the jeep I got a glance of myself in the side mirror. I looked like a crazy version of Medusa with my long hair standing straight up, having been tossed about by the same wind that stole my shoe. The 80 year old cowboy who was watching had tears in his eyes from laughter. And that is how you end up chasing a thong.

xoxoxoxoxo

Cats Mounting Hens and a Look Beyond The Weeds!

 My kitty prefers sleeping on a chicken rather than on comfy couches...go figure!

Beyond the weeds there are blooms. Beyond the weeds there is laughter. Beyond the weeds there are  riches.

 

 

 

 

xoxoxoxoxo

How To Trick Kids Into Reading

I was watching my sisters two beautiful (and very wiggly) kids for a few day while she was out of town. They are not very big readers. To encourage reading, I went to the library and checked out a dozen beautifully illustrated children books. Now here was the catch, one of the 12 books contained a swear word. (Come on, I remember the first time I read a swear word in a book, I damn near wore out the page rereading it at the tender age of 8, the book was James and the Giant Peach!) Now I told these bright children that inside these beautiful and magical books that not only would you travel to faraway places and become kings and queens, and even a toad, but there was also a SWEAR WORD!!!! I would not tell them which book-after all, begging means nothing to a seasoned veteran like myself! Read on!!! Let the games begin. They read all the books even after they found the swear word!!!!

Planting the seeds of reading one swear word at a time!

xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo

Lingerie For Perry Mason!

I am a huge fan of Perry Mason. Late nights during the week I have spent many hours with him. He and Della make such a great team. Her giggle, his almost grin, her "I told you so look" and him paying for dinner! That being said, while rummaging through my old 1950's Good Housekeeping magazines I ran into a advertisement with Della, um I mean Barbara Hale in lingerie!

Have you ever seen lingerie made with so much material, so long and so blue?? I can just picture Della bringing Perry some hot tea, stirring the fire and tucking a sick Perry into the couch with a big fluffy blanket...oh wait that WAS an episod but Della had on a smart 2 piece outfit... it was gray I believe. Well really wasn't everything she wore gray!

Sunday is for the Cats! LOL

This is so funny, I had to share. I have no idea how they did this without laughing!

Camera In The Coop!!!

You lookin' at me?

Maran and Wellsummer both about 10 weeks old. They lay the beautiful dark chocolate colored eggs, or they will after puberty!

Very broody! ( Don't even be taking my eggs fool or I will peck you!!)

My Malaysian Serama, White Silkie Bantam (BFF...hehehehe) and a Plymouth Rock.

Plymouth Rock egg, Silkie Bantam egg and the Malaysian Serama egg. (Followed by an inedible penny..hehehe!)

A good size comparision of the hens.

 Silkie Bantam  with her best buddy the Malaysian Serama. I love the wings and tail of the Seramas!!!

Midnight Runs With Snuffleupagus, A Little Steampunk And Playing With Matches!

It has rained a great deal here, mind you I am not complaining. With the rain comes hours of me not having to drag hoses around the yard and the security that all of our young plants are getting enough water. The only draw back is that my 100 pound dog is a scaredy cat! He is so scared of thunder that he escapes from our yard and just runs. We have provided him with shelter and he is even on the back porch now, but still he will break open the screen door and just RUN!!! He goes through screen doors, over and under fences as if they were a mere stepping stone placed there just for his escape! So Tuesday night a big storm rolled in around 3:00 a.m. and before we could bring him in, off he went! My husband got into the car and me in my jammies, no glasses and no shoes jogged to the corner and back in the pounding rain and cursing the damn dog outloud! I must have looked like a crazy woman... I ended up returning home, changing p.j.'s and then crawling into bed. Hubby finaly returned to find what looked like snuffleupagus in our driveway.

We never did fully go back to sleep and I found that as the day went on I was merely a bystander. I don't even recall making dinner.... Damn dog has some redeeming qualities. I have not had any more raccoons eating my chickens, his big brown button eyes are adorable, he is a great running partner and having to pick up dog crap makes for one hell of a punishment for teenagers!

 Steampunk- An imaginary Victorian age, that features brass and copper clockwork and steampowered inventions that go far beyond 1800's technology. Steam powered mechanical wonders, optimistic gear driven computers, dirigibles, clockwork parts, and stuff like that.

So I am doing another swap. This one is a Steampunk charm swap at A Work In Progress. I chose to do this because first it is something I had never heard of, second it is sooo cool, and third it works with tiny little things (and I dig tiny little things). Also,  because I generaly work with items that are organic, like seeds, plants, shell, rock etc,  this is a new element for me. Well I have had so mush fun. I believe the host of the swap is still looking for 2 more people so if you're interested pop on over and give her a look-see. Here is a sneak peak at what I have done...

I really wish the details showed up in the picture. It is filled with little tiny gears, gems, springs and metal work pieces. But of course I also threw in some beautiful blue shell from a robins egg. They are all about the size of a watch face. I am so going to make more!!!

Bad Penny over at The Linen Shelf hosted a matchbox swap and I just had to join. I sent my decorated matchboxes filled with red sand, anise seeds, licorice root and feathers to England. Today in the mail was a package full of matchboxes. I was so happy to see all the different mediums people used to create their little boxes. It was a great swap!

 

I am playing around with the idea of hosting a handmade bookmark swap... what do you think?

A Work In Progress

Chicken In Hiding and Penny Eggs!

Yesterday, while working in the yard, I was nearly attacked by a Silkie Bantam!

After rooting around the back end of my compost, I discovered my Silkie had moved out of the pen and had taken herself a deluxe one-nest apartment next to an all-you-can-eat buffet (also known as the compost pile).

 Now, I had been wondering why my Silkie Bantam had stopped producing eggs. The little sneak wanted to hatch a brood! All in all, we found ten eggs. I chose my son to kick her off to bring in the eggs.

This morning, on the way to the coop to let the ladies out, my Malaysian Serama was just a-hollerin'. For being pint-sized, she sure does have a howl. She's the second loudest in my flock (the loudest being my Brahma Hen). She was so proud of herself, for she had laid her first egg ever! It's slightly larger than a penny, and I can't wait to do some Pysanky artwork on it. I wonder how many calories, maybe five? Haha!

Shell-Less Egg!

Rooster in Puberty

So yesterday I had to call my utility company to discuss a bill... but first it must be said that I live in a very old and very small house. I have had chickens in my computer room (no other room available)all winter and out of the three baby Malaysian Seramas one turned out to be a rooster. Living in Utah it is far too cold to let the chicks be outside, so under the heat light inside they have stayed...While talking to the costumer service representative the little rooster began to crow. He did not crow once but repeatedly and every time his little voice began to crack the phone fell silent. After about five minutes the costumer service lady asked me if I needed to go, I explained the sound she heard was a rooster which was followed by "YOU KEEP A ROOSTER IN YOUR HOUSE??!! WHY DO YOU KEEP A ROOSTER IN YOUR HOUSE?!, REALLY I THOUGHT YOU WERE BEATING YOUR KIDS!!!" She kept putting me on hold and I know she called every employee to the phone to listen to the rooster trapped in a puberty possessed crow. It is such a sad and scratchy crow I thought I would share. Enjoy a laugh on me!